Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Full disclosure and fair balance

Back in my journalism days we often talked of ethics, and terms like "fair balance" were heroically slung about and then tucked back, unused, into their little holsters--as if the mere mention of them was enough. I often worried about things like fair balance, portraying both sides of the story factually and letting readers make up their own opinions. That is one of the reasons I was a poor journalist and ended up writing features about nerdsports like geocaching rather than the latest city council scandal.

Well now I have to admit that in looking at this blog I have become one of the legion that only tells one side of the story. And this is inexcusable. It comes from a place of love and wonderment at my husband's unique quirks, and my desire to share them with friends and family. And then my desire to have everyone laugh along with me so I can feel better about being a stay-at-home loaf who wears sweatpants and Christmas socks all day and watches things like Hoarders and People's Court (more on that soon). The man does things with rubber bands, duct tape, trashbags and apples that mystify and amaze me. (Yes, I realize that last sentence sounds either perverted or illegal, but I can assure it's neither. However, if I tell you these stories, the kids at lunch might make fun of him again. Sorry). But really, who am I to deprive people of knowing that yes, they are not alone in their weirdness?...That the intern who spends five minutes tying practice knots on the ties of garbage bags is in good company.

I feel bad if I've caused him any embarassment by focusing mostly on him and have determined I will try to do better in the future, starting today. Now. With this photo of my work uniform.Friends, trust me when I tell you that outfits like the one above make it not only easy to sling mud about your husband's penchant for cutting the heels out of his tennis shoes, but also indeed necessary for the maintenance of your self esteem. When you go from a burgeoning designer at a big city agency to a nanny for a 2-year-old girl who farts on you EVERY time you babysit and a 4-year-old boy whose idea of creative expression is to douse his room in baby powder, you forget that you have a couple of awards at home, that people used to compliment you on your sense of style and your ridiculously straight hair. As I write this, you should know that I am attired in a variation of the above outfit which involves pajama pants with multicolored lollipops on them, black Christmas socks with reindeer on them and a fuzzy blue pullover with pawprints on it. I know, right out of Babysitter's Club, right? As Snookie (see Jersey Shore) would say, "Eff my life."

Let's look at some highlights from the above outfit. Please note:
1. Unwashed hair.
2. Bermuda triathlon t-shirt (haahahahahahahahahha, triathlon--see #4) with permanent sweat scent embedded in it.
3. Topped by world's ugliest factory-made sweater. A true feat; usually the ugliest sweaters are hand knit. BTW, it has a 5 inch hole in the back that makes it hang off my shoulder funny.
4. In the midsection you will see the Nuptial 19 I gained after we sealed the deal back in October, which is why I am on the F(l)at Belly Diet and have become a total funbuster who doesn't do fun things like eat or drink to excess anymore.
5. The pants are stretchy lounge pants and I think that as of te taking of that photo, I had been wearing them for about 3 days.
6. Beneath that are some increasingly smelly kelly green house shoes I bought myself for Christmas. But really, I think they're a gift to everyone.

That Philip. He's a lucky man, huh? Now you see why I must, like a 5-year-old on the playground, hit him first--metaphorically speaking--so that he focuses on something other than my ridiculous outfit when he comes home at night.


  1. Well, I personally LOVE that outfit! And I don't see the 'mate weight'. I think you look cute. Really great post!

  2. I think that outfit is lovely! You don't even want to see what I wore today ;) lol
    Nothing wrong at all!

  3. Hi! Just found your blog through a suggestion on Surviving Long Distance Love.

    Am another physician's wife, living in a cold and snowy place, and I work in sweats/pajamas. Sounds like we have something in common!

    Looking forward to reading more!